Friday, April 23, 2010

(not) Heard In Our Home

Matt said I should blog about this. But really, I think it's going to lower everyone's opinions of me as a mother. I'm not a very nice person.

Who:  Leah and myself
What:  The One Where The Whole World Went Silent
When:  Monday, April 19, 2010
Where:  It all started in the car.
How:  The kids and I had just gotten back from running some errands (although Leah calls them Aarons, "Are we going to run some Aarons, and then go see him?"). I was feeling lazy about getting our purchases and the kids back into the house so I just decided to sit in the car for a minute or two. 

Leah: "Mom, may I join you in the front seat?"
Me: "Sure."

Leah starts talking about one thing or another, it probably involved what she wanted for lunch and which movie she wanted to watch after her nap. Apparently my replies had been made in too quiet of a voice.
Leah: "Mom, stop talking quiet."
Me, as a really mean thought occurs, mouthing the words: "I'm not."
Leah: "Mom, I can't hear you. Talk louder."
Me, mouthing the words: "I am."

This continued for a while in the car until I decided it really was time to get into the house and be productive. I thought, briefly, about discontinuing this behavior. It really was annoying Leah and she was steadily getting more and more upset with me. Oh well, what harm can it cause. I'd just go and check the mail, then I'd be done with the charade.

Leah: "Mom, what are you doing?"
Me, mouthing the words: "I'm going to check the mail."
Leah: "Mom! You have to talk!"
Me, mouthing th words: "You can't hear me?"
Leah: "No! Talk normal!"

Well, I'm getting more impressed with her lip reading skills as the minutes tick on. She was  concentrating so hard on the words I was mouthing. I decided to let it go on just a little bit longer as I headed into the house. The entire time I was mouthing things like, "Open the door, please" and "Take your shoes off" and "Go sit at the counter for lunch." She paid attention and did as she was asked. All the while saying, "Mom! Talk normal!"

Finally she was done with it. Leah burst into tears, the real kind, saying, "Mom, I just want you to talk normal."

I couldn't help it, I started laughing and said, "I was just pretending."

Leah's tearful reply: "Mom, I though I couldn't hear anything anymore."
Of course, I felt A W F U L (in the most entertained way). You may be wondering how long this whole escapade lasted. Oh, only a short 20 minutes... and I did try it again yesterday, it didn't last more than a sentence or two because Leah said, "Mom! Do not start that again."


Amber said...

I am laughing so hard! It's funny because you always had to tell Leah to talk louder because she had such a tiny voice! And I'm not used to you saying "kids" yet!

Banker said...

So funny. I feel so bad for her, but holy cow I'm cracking up wishing I'd been there.

Nicole said...

I don't think you are a bad mom. I think that is a good lesson in lip reading. Maybe kids would obey better if they had to work at reading lips. I am pretty sure Zach wouldn't have figured it out!

Sarah said...

That's really funny! :) I don't think you're a bad mom. Sounds like a good exercise. I'll have to try that sometime. Benjamin very frequently asks me, "WHAT?? I CAN'T HEAR YOU MOMMY!!" when I'm talking to him in a totally normal tone.

Kelly said...

That's so funny. Cohen gets really upset with me too, when I whisper. Kids are funny.

Lindsay Quinney said...

That is so funny! You are not a bad mom. I think most people would have carried on the charade!

The Lambert Family said...

That's hilarious! Don't worry, I do stuff like that too. Sometimes you can't help it! :)

Karen said...

Oh please. Everyone is just being polite. You ARE a bad mom.

janessa gibson said...

Very nice.

Busty LaRue said...

Is it bad that my husband and I are laughing hysterically at this? haha

Megan said...

leah is adorable! i just love her and parker is sweet to! they are just sweet adorable children! i loved those pictures of the kids holding signs that spell "dad". i love the one with an "A" when it is both leah and parker holding the sign. if you look at parker's face, his expression is like a mixture of "let go of me leah!" and "what's that thing she is holding" and "let me have that... whatever it is leah!"